Half Wit
Episode 315 : 2007-03-06
Musical savant Patrick Obyedkov needs his father to help him button his tuxedo in a theater dressing room. Dr. Obyedkov introduces his son, explaining that an accident 25 years earlier caused Patrick to have neurological disabilities. Patrick begins to play the piano perfectly, but it then turns frantic. The muscles in his hands and arm have fully tensed. His fingers start to bend backwards.
House pages the team at five am. Cameron is the first to arrive, but when Foreman and Chase hear that the patient is a 35 year-old savant with dystonia, they're ready to go back to bed. House comes in, and his interest in the case means that they all must stay. Patrick had been a 10 year-old boy with no prior musical training. After a car accident, he suddenly became a genius pianist. Foreman argues that savantism is just one of those mysterious things, but House orders new labs -- CBC with platelets, chem panel, thyroid and adrenal function tests. They are to look for anything.
As he examines Patrick, Foreman quickly learns that the patient has trouble telling left from right and he repeats whatever people say to him. House has a piano wheeled into Patrick's room for another test. After he plays, Patrick mimics every note and movement. House asks Patrick to close his eyes then mashes the keys. Patrick perfectly identifies the cacophonous notes. With the hand fixed for now, Foreman and Dr. Obyedkov want Patrick discharged. House wants him to remain, and he orders Foreman to schedule a functional MRI of Patrick's brain.
The doctors strap Patrick into the FMRI machine. They play some classical music but nothing flashes in the brain. Foreman observes that listening and playing are two completely different neurological processes. House asks Patrick to pretend his leg is a piano and to play it. As his fingers dance on his leg, the FMRI begins lighting up and Patrick's heart rate rises without the limbic system activating. House tells Foreman that they need to get Patrick into surgery immediately.
As Foreman scrubs up for surgery, Cameron mentions that she found an airline ticket in House's mail. He is going to Boston. She wonders about an opening for a Division Chief of Infectious Diseases at Harvard. Foreman notes that it isn't like House to be ambitious, but he did notice House testing blood in the clinic. However, basic medical clearance for employment would require a cholesterol and glucose check.
Since they know that House would never tell them the truth, the doctors decide to borrow one of his favorite moves and break into the subject's residence. Chase and Cameron go to his apartment. Chase asks if she wants to have a go on House's bed. Cameron thinks this isn't the time, but her smile indicates that it's a definite possibility. Chase comes across a phone bill with multiple calls to a 617 area code. He dials and reaches Massachusetts General Hospital.
Back at the hospital, Foreman is snaking a catheter through Patrick's femoral artery toward the heart. Patrick's heart rate begins accelerating to 160, then 210. Foreman has to break out the paddles to save him. The doctors discuss Patrick's heart attack during surgery. House thinks a sudden bleed might explain both the attack and the dystonia, so he orders a colonoscopy and an upper endoscopy. If that doesn't show anything, they can also perform an enteroscopy to look at the small bowel.
Tipped off by Chase and Cameron, Cuddy calls Mass General and tells a Dr. Medick that she's not letting House go without a fight. Dr. Medick assures Cuddy that they aren't interested in hiring him. Cuddy asks if House might be a patient. Indirectly answering her, Dr. Medick says that neither he nor Dr. Kupersmith can stand House.
Cuddy tracks down Wilson and finds out that Kupersmith's specialty is brain cancer. Cuddy ticks off some symptoms, wondering why House isn't showing any signs of cancer. Plus, he hasn't told anybody. Wilson explains that symptoms take time to show and that most cancer patients keep the news to themselves because they don't want every conversation thereafter to revolve around cancer.
Cameron catches up with Wilson. He tries to avoid the talk, but Cameron states that if she needs to start looking for work, then she has a right to know. Wilson finds House in his office later and artfully works brain cancer into the chat. House winces, claiming that it's nothing. Wilson asks to at least see his chart, wondering why House wouldn't come to him. Chase interrupts with a surgical report. House was right -- Patrick had a bleed behind his kidney, but there's no cancer or ruptured arteries that would cause it. House ignores this report as he stares at Chase. He knows the cancer news is out. Wilson claims that he only told Cameron.
House gathers the team to confront the cancer question and he assures them it's not an issue. The team asks him for some blood to double check with tests, but House is only interested in discussing Patrick's case. Why are his seizures getting worse? House suggests ceasing the anti-convulsant medication to let the seizures really kick in. Maybe that will direct them somewhere. Cameron worries that multiple seizures will only damage Patrick's brain. House points out that the man's brain isn't in prime condition anyway. When Patrick gets worse, they can run a PET scan.
Cameron asks House to sign a letter of recommendation she wrote in his name because she is applying for a job at Penn. House brings up the cancer and Cameron pauses. They move closer to each other and suddenly begin kissing. While their lips are locked, Cameron reaches into her pocket for a syringe. House, sensing the movement, grabs her hand. She pleads that they need his blood for tests. House directs her to his file in the records room. Everything they would want is in there.
Cameron finds the CAT scan in House's file and takes it to Foreman. He spots a six-centimeter mass in House's dorsal midbrain extending into the temporal lobe. The brain cancer is inoperable. Foreman figures that House has less than a year to live. The team continues poring through House's file, noticing that he has a consent form for a drug trial. However, it's not a cancer treatment but a drug used to treat depression in cancer patients. The procedure involves implanting drug-eluting chips into the pleasure centers of the brain.
House brings the team Patrick's PET scan, which reveals several more hot spots in no distinct pattern. The left brain is working harder than the right. Cameron pronounces bleeding in the brain. House goes to perform an angiogram to look at the vasculature in the brain. House notices tiny dots. The MRA confirmed small collections of blood throughout the white matter of Patrick's right hemisphere. That could be trauma, an aneurysm, cancer or autoimmune disease. They will need a biopsy of all parts of the brain. The team argues that House can't just randomly pluck out pieces of a patient's brain. Foreman suggests an internal EEG. An external test can get confused, but an EEG from inside the skull would reveal exactly where to biopsy. It's risky, but worth it.
Later, Foreman finds House alone in Patrick's room. Before he hands over the test results, Foreman wants to discuss something personal. Despite House's attempts to drive everybody away, Foreman still likes him. He turns back to the patient's EEG. There are no electrical abnormalities. What it did show is that Patrick's entire right hemisphere is brain dead.
House mentions that Patrick is left handed and can still speak, so perhaps the right hemisphere still has some random neurons firing. House and Foreman head to Patrick's room with a small electronic piano. Foreman covers Patrick's right eye and asks him what's on the table. Patrick identifies the piano. Foreman then covers the left eye and asks again. Patrick has no idea. House plays a few bars of a tune and then spins the piano around to Patrick. He plays it perfectly. The doctors exit. In the hallway, House argues that Patrick's right brain has always been damaged. Yet this is irrelevant to the current issue. Foreman realizes this means the problem is autoimmune and they can begin treatment.
Chase finds House in his office and asks to chat. House sighs at another emotional moment. Chase ignores him and hugs House. Then he says that Patrick is responding to treatment. Unfortunately, now comes the next step. House rings Cuddy's doorbell in the middle of the night. House lets her know that Patrick has Takayasu syndrome, which Cuddy points out is manageable with steroids. House wants a hemispherectomy since the right side of Patrick's brain is basically useless. It would stop the seizures. Cuddy responds that they will need to ask Dr. Obyedkov about his son's treatment.
House appeals his idea to Dr. Obyedkov. With the right brain removed, the left brain could stop compensating and function on its own. Patrick would begin learning new things but would lose the ability to play the piano. Dr. Obyedkov argues that Patrick is doing fine and that he doesn't mind taking care of his son. House counters that he has made Patrick into a trained monkey, but that this procedure would allow him to grow into an adult. Is Dr. Obyedkov is afraid to let him go?
Dr. Obyedkov asks his son if he's happy. When Patrick merely repeats his father's words, Dr. Obyedkov picks up the phone to grant consent for the procedure. The hemispherectomy is performed successfully.
The doctors study a scan of House's brain, hoping to get him approved for a clinical trial. Unfortunately, he is negative for protein PHF and thus doesn't qualify. Suddenly, Chase notices something odd on the scan. They rush to House's door and announce that he doesn't have cancer. There was an abnormal presence of IgC and IgM in his brain, plus a gumma, which is usually found in the liver. House mentions that he doesn't have syphilis because his VDRL was negative. The team did a new test, which means that House got a false negative. House pauses and asks if they sent the results to Mass General. When they admit they did, he calls them idiots.
It wasn't his file. House tells them that the real patient is in the Witherspoon wing of Princeton-Plainsboro. They can tell the man's wife that he's not dying of cancer but is cheating on her. The doctors angrily ask if House was faking cancer. He wanted the doctors at Mass General to think he had cancer so that he could take part in the drug trial that places an implant in the pleasure center of his brain. Exasperated, Cameron asks House if he faked cancer to get high. The doctors stumble away in shock.
The next day, House does a follow up on Patrick. He doesn't respond to House's verbal cues, but then Patrick buttons his own shirt and smiles.
第15集（S3EP15:Half-Wit）
Half-Wit：笨蛋。看完這集後，你會想究竟這是指最後只有半個大腦的病人Patrick，還是指一廂情願地認為Patrick很快樂的父親Obyedkov，是指被House的假癌症弄的團團轉的小鴨子們和Cuddy、Wilson，或者就是指為了讓自己更High而不惜推開周圍關心自己的人，而製造假癌症的House本人。
先說一下這集的客串演員，飾演病人父親的Kurtwood Smith不是別人，在《死亡詩社》（"Dead Poets Society"）裡他扮演Robert Sean Leonard（Wilson）的父親。而他在電視劇"That 70’s Show"中客串的角色Red Foreman，這個人物的兒子就叫Eric Foreman，名字和"House M.D."裡的Foreman一摸一樣。所以這個傢伙也算和"House M.D."一劇有種種的聯繫了。
而扮演病人Patrick的演員，就是<url=http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dave_Matthews]Dave Matthews[/url]。在1996年度第39屆格萊美獎中，“Dave Matthews樂隊”憑藉專輯《Crash》中的單曲《So Much To Say》獲得了最佳搖滾組合獎(Best Rock Performance By A Duo Or Group With Vocal)
片頭裝早餐的紙袋上的字
片頭過後人物出場時放在桌上裝早餐的紙袋，應該是House大叔買給小鴨子們的，上面寫著"GOOD MORNING, Read NOW, XO, YO YO MAMA"。這個並不是什麼隱喻，但是可能有些人不明白所以還是解釋一下
其中的XO就是hug & kiss（抱抱親親）的意思。X為擁抱時候2手交叉的樣子，O為親親時候的口型。
而YO MAMA則是一個黑人俚語，Google一下可以發現很多yo mama開頭的笑話，其實字面意思就是“你媽媽”（Your Mama）的意思。這里加了一個Yo，我覺得可以有2種可能：
1是第一個Yo只是語氣詞（聽過饒舌的都知道，裡面的人有事沒事就"YO, YO, YO"的）
2是這個Yo Yo Mama是將Yo Yo Ma（馬友友，大家應該知道是誰吧）和yo mama結合到一起的一個trick。
而YO MAMA字面上雖然是“你媽媽”的意思，其實複雜點就是“嘿，你媽媽是如此的XXX”的省略句。不過這個XXX一般都不是什麼好詞。比如：
“路人甲: 你真醜(You’re so ugly!)
路人乙: 你媽也是(Yeah, well so’s YO MAMA!)”
或者
“你媽真醜，就和恐怖片裡的人似的”(Yo mama so ugly people watch her during horror movies.)
表面上是說的對方老母，其實還是指桑駡槐的罵對方本人，就類似我們國人罵人的時候，前面也總加一句“你TMD”一樣，或者類似廣東這邊的“XX你老母”。
我覺得這個yo yo mama翻譯成“嘿，你TMD”比較合適。
整個紙袋上的話就是：
“早上好
現在就看（病例）
抱一抱親一親
（估計小鴨子們要發牢騷了）
嘿，你TMD”
還是很符合大叔的說話風格的。
1.House: In the record room under the name "Luke N.Laura".
HOUSE: 以"luke N.Laura"名字保存在記錄室
20分25秒，House和Cameron接吻後（N多人等了3季總算盼來了這個鏡頭呀），大叔告訴Cameron自己的病例以“Luke與Laura”的化名保存著。這個化名並不是隨便取的。Luke和Laura都是肥皂劇"General Hospital"中的角色，而他們是夫婦。以這對夫婦的故事為主線的時期也是該肥皂劇最輝煌的時期（也許這就是現在的醫務劇總要或多或少的加入“愛情”成份的原因吧），而這出肥皂劇也是House最愛看的一部（如果你之前注意到的話，你會發現大叔在醫院看的電視，很多時候就是在看這齣戲）。
2.Dueling Banjos
28分53秒，House在病房向Foreman證明Patrick的右腦並沒完全壞死的時候，他彈了一小段音樂並讓Patrick演奏——彈琴需要整個大腦協調工作。他彈的那段音樂名為"Dueling Banjos"，出自1972年獲得三項奧斯卡提名的電影《激流四勇士》（"Deliverance"），這部電影在IMDB上的評分高達7.9分。片中[url=http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0714681/"Billy Redden[/url]扮演的角色Lonny也是一個腦子遲鈍卻天賦異稟的琴手，不過彈奏的不是Piano，而是Banjo。
3.House: One small feel for a man, one giant ass for mankind.
...
Cuddy: Call the make a wish foundation!
HOUSE: 對一個男人來說，只是一點微不足道的感覺；對人類來說，卻是一個大屁股。
...（然後大叔裝作想跟Cuddy進臥室-__-）
CUDDY: 給“許願基金會”打電話吧（做你的美夢去吧）！
32分55秒House夜訪Cuddy，利用Cuddy的好心“騙取”了一個擁抱，抱的時候毫不顧忌的摸了Cuddy的屁股。他說的這句話的原句大家應該不會陌生。正是第一個登上月球的美國宇航員阿姆斯特（Neil Armstrong）朗踏上月球時說的名言"That’s one small step for a man, one giant leap for mankind"（對一個人來說，這只是一小步；對全人類而言，這卻是一大步）。而Cuddy之後說的“許願基金會”則是一家專門幫助數以千計的病孩和殘疾小孩實現他們夢想的慈善組織。2005年迪士尼（Disney）為了紀念來自“許願基金會”的孩子參觀狄斯奈樂園數達到50,000名，其與該基金會共同出品了一張以“愛心”、“友誼”、“夢想”為主題的專輯《Wishes!》。其中收錄了眾多代表性的迪士尼名曲，由眾多明星（Barbra Streisand, Sting, Olivia Newton-John, Elton John, Kenny Loggins, Bette Midler, Phil Collins等）演繹。
最後提一下病人Patrick在開場演奏會上以及後來在做核磁共振時在腿上彈的曲子，都是貝多芬（Ludwig van Beethoven）的曲目“華爾斯坦奏鳴曲”（Waldstein Sonata）。另外大叔已經好幾集沒嗑藥了。。-_-
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